Fall Frolics
Hellooooo Spooky Season! Spider webs remind us about creativity and finding patterns in the world. The changing leaves display vibrancy that awes and inspires us. When we feel the wind swirl the leaves we sense the tug of the season demonstrating to us that letting go is the healthy path forward. This particular week in Autumn offered us glimpses of magic—a comet burning brightly, a Full Hunters Moon as the biggest full moon all year, and you learning to be content with it all.
Rather than type up the trail review of the Tahoe Rim Trail that I planned, I’m in need of taking a short hiatus. Fortunately, I had already decided to give myself a break from also creating a spotlight this week in hopes of shifting to pitching an article instead. And while that didn’t happen, at least I received inspiration to revisit my goals and reshape them (Thanks Katie B.!).
I began this week by enjoying a walk in the woods to revel in the radiant Fall foliage. Then, slowed down my pace at work to match the impending season, relished the warm sun as much as possible, stood outside enamored with the soft glow of the comet while honoring the loss of my grandmother, and winked at the full moon in gratitude of my Moon Sisters. I’ll end this week visiting family, which I hold mixed emotions on. The statement, “I wish you had chosen family” from my grandmother still reverberates in my head simultaneous to my own whisperings, “why have they never included me?” and “is it because I was always the extra?”
Since I am the youngest of three (note the odd number) and the only daughter (again with the odds), I was always left out or relegated to a sleeping bag on the floor or pushing chairs together to create a bed in hotel rooms on vacation or for my brother’s traveling soccer games. And pushed aside to the kids table as an adult or completely ignored simply because I chose to move westward/not to have kids/didn’t fit. After a lifetime of being treated as the nuisance, the obligation, invited merely out of formality, how is my family clueless that I don’t want to partake because I was never included in the first place?
Hmmmm, apparently we all don’t see what we don’t want to see. We can toss the blame on the one who moved away without accepting our own behaviors as a part of the equation. Things to consider, I guess. Sigh. Families. The complexities are endless. Thank goodness for our chosen families! Those who reach out and check in on us. Those who want to spend time with you and always have your back. These are the reminders that help me feel loved and that I’m deeply grateful for. The glimmers of magical moments in my life. They include you because they love you. They want to hold deep conversations, to truly know and appreciate you for being you.
Thank you for connecting with me. And guess what?! Y’all are connecting with each other! That is what I deem success for this blog = bringing people together. So in this season of gratitude for our abundance, spices that stir warmth and nostalgia, and cozy sweatah weathah, let us remember to weave the shiny tremulous glimmers of webbing to tether ourselves to those we love.